When you get to a certain point of life, depending anywhere between your teens or adult life.

You begin to think if there's anyone for you. Maybe someone did like me! Maybe someone did care about me! Maybe... Maybe... someone did have the guts to want to ask but they never did!

Then you look at other people, those in happy relationships, you start asking yourself "I wish I had a love life". then doomer scroll your fucking way out of your stupid gap, you start doing the stupidest shit ever, you find love then they stay for 2 months or so, then they leave. Maybe even a long year! and they will leave you!

It's a complicated process for you people, and it is for me as well! Maybe if I loved longer? Maybe if I started to selflove myself? That doesn't cut it when you are in a state of deep dark depression of loneliness. You start drinking alcohol because you have to do it as that keeps you off of that shit of eternal loneliness. You start smoking cigarettes to make it all feel better. You start to take drugs! You start to make your life a living hell! Then?.. It becomes nothing anymore! You've already killed yourself by then.

Instead of doing all of that.. maybe reach out some help? maybe read a book or two!.. maybe dedicate your life into not finding love (Yeah, i get it. being a virgin in the year 20XX is shocking... but boohoo!)

ad fīnem.

>Yeah, i get it. being a virgin in the year 20XX is shocking...

Nah. I know plenty of people that are even older than me and only a few of them are not virgins.

Generational wise in the big 25 where people are becoming adults from 2006 are gonna either suffer or not..

It’s strange how the timeline splits the moment you hit that point where you’re no longer waiting for life to begin—just watching the reruns in your own head.

The stuff you thought you’d “grow into”? Relationships, clarity, feeling wanted? For some of us it never lands. Not because we’re broken or cursed or unlovable—but because we waited. Waited for some proof we were worthy first. Waited for someone to knock, waited to feel "ready." Meanwhile the years passed.

Now we talk about it in forum posts and edit our bios like that changes the past. Maybe it does a little.

Honestly, I think it’s okay if the idea of “love” stays an abstract painting. I’ve learned to survive on other things. Quiet mornings. Old tech that still boots up. Memes from people I’ll never meet. The soft buzz of headphones at 2 a.m. Sometimes that’s enough to keep me alive. Sometimes it isn’t. But I’m still here.

“Seeking what is true is not seeking what is desirable.”
Yeah. I felt that.

ad fīnem? maybe. but not tonight.

the solution is to not think about it too much and just talk to fellas