>>20419
who has people over for a grill and beer and doesn't even let them in the yard hahaha
Grilling emergency
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Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:05:16
OP is trollin but idc this is hilarious.
I'm literally a tranny btw not sure if that makes a differemce. I don't give handjobs because my current bf made me afraid of sex a couple years ago and I never bounced back from it.
I'm literally a tranny btw not sure if that makes a differemce. I don't give handjobs because my current bf made me afraid of sex a couple years ago and I never bounced back from it.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:10:43
>>20421
Good point, especially for the 4th of July which is very outside focused.
Idk maybe tell them he already put the grill away since the dogs were already done.
Good point, especially for the 4th of July which is very outside focused.
Idk maybe tell them he already put the grill away since the dogs were already done.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:11:49
>>20422
The gun is always available anon
The gun is always available anon
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:14:22
>>20423
>good lord what is going on in there!
>grill storage
>may I see it?
>no
>good lord what is going on in there!
>grill storage
>may I see it?
>no
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:19:14
>>20424
I'm not American and have no use for one anyway
I'm not American and have no use for one anyway
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:22:03
>>20423
people don't just put their grill away unless it's winter lol. there's nothing OP can do to not come across as at least a little bit of a weirdo, every excuse is just digging his hole deeper (assuming any of this is even real, which it very likely isn't but it's fun so whatever).
honestly the best thing OP could probably do at this point if he isn't willing to just outright cancel, is say that he had something come up earlier in the day and ran out of time to prepare a grill cookout but he still wanted to host so he bought some dogs and beers. apologize and say you'll host a proper grill another time, which buys him enough time to actually learn how to use it, or just keep pushing it back until people forget about it.
people don't just put their grill away unless it's winter lol. there's nothing OP can do to not come across as at least a little bit of a weirdo, every excuse is just digging his hole deeper (assuming any of this is even real, which it very likely isn't but it's fun so whatever).
honestly the best thing OP could probably do at this point if he isn't willing to just outright cancel, is say that he had something come up earlier in the day and ran out of time to prepare a grill cookout but he still wanted to host so he bought some dogs and beers. apologize and say you'll host a proper grill another time, which buys him enough time to actually learn how to use it, or just keep pushing it back until people forget about it.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:24:56
>>20423
grillmeisters get a natural high from grilling in front of guests, questions WILL be asked why the grill is absent or any lack of charcoal smell
grillmeisters get a natural high from grilling in front of guests, questions WILL be asked why the grill is absent or any lack of charcoal smell
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:29:56
>>20427
He could say he put the grill away because he was afraid one of them would steal it because it’s such a good grill. That re-establishes his grill king status while also relocating blame for the grill being absent onto the guests
He could say he put the grill away because he was afraid one of them would steal it because it’s such a good grill. That re-establishes his grill king status while also relocating blame for the grill being absent onto the guests
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:32:00
Wouldn’t it make more sense to just not talk about the grill at all to limit attention brought to its abscess?
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:33:18
>>20428
>charcoal smell
propane. taste the meat, not the heat
>charcoal smell
propane. taste the meat, not the heat
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:37:25
>>20430
perfect. and if somebody brings it up, just stonewall them.
perfect. and if somebody brings it up, just stonewall them.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:40:50
>>20426
The noose is always available anon
The noose is always available anon
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:43:24
Drop by a hardware store and buy a modest grill, leave the tags on it so you can return it next week, then show them that if they ask
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:53:23
>>20426
>have no use for one
I beg to differ.
>have no use for one
I beg to differ.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 00:57:49
>>20434
>yep here she is, where the magic happens. I promise you, this spotless grill that still has the tags on it was used an hour ago to make these hot dogs
>yep here she is, where the magic happens. I promise you, this spotless grill that still has the tags on it was used an hour ago to make these hot dogs
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 01:00:17
>>20436
just show it to them quickly and from a distance so they can't examine it too closely.
just show it to them quickly and from a distance so they can't examine it too closely.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 01:37:18
>>20371
>5 and a half hours ago
so? how's it going, anon?
>5 and a half hours ago
so? how's it going, anon?
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 01:50:30
>>20371
Update us you stupid prick take a picture of the hot dogs
Update us you stupid prick take a picture of the hot dogs
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 02:09:46
>>20371
>main hobbies are watching anime and jerking off
More proof that people who watch anime are virgin incels
>main hobbies are watching anime and jerking off
More proof that people who watch anime are virgin incels
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 02:11:55
>>20371
I feel sorry for anyone who falls for this red-dit copypasta
I feel sorry for anyone who falls for this red-dit copypasta
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 02:12:08
>>20440
room temperature IQ take
room temperature IQ take
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 02:57:21
>>20422
bro added a fun fact
bro added a fun fact
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 05:59:31
OP I know this was a larp but you seriously couldn't even come up with a decent conclusion? come on, put some effort in.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 08:19:38
>>20404
Delightfully devilish anon.
Delightfully devilish anon.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 08:44:55
>>20371
Lies poison not only your soul but the souls of those who hear them. Maybe use this as a learning experience.
Lies poison not only your soul but the souls of those who hear them. Maybe use this as a learning experience.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 09:00:27
>>20442
No he's right you dumbass weeb
No he's right you dumbass weeb
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 09:15:44
>>20444
My headcanon is the dogs weren’t actually cooked and OP is in the hospital with food poisoning from eating barely microwaved raw dogs while insisting to his guests they were grilled to perfection
My headcanon is the dogs weren’t actually cooked and OP is in the hospital with food poisoning from eating barely microwaved raw dogs while insisting to his guests they were grilled to perfection
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 10:21:09
>>20377
Only works if you have Aurora Borealis in your kitchen
Only works if you have Aurora Borealis in your kitchen
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 10:25:06
>>20371
I’d fuck his wife if he asked me to. He seems like a good guy
I’d fuck his wife if he asked me to. He seems like a good guy
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 10:25:19
>>20404
Hahaahaaaa this is great
Youd better come back and update us. I need to know what happens
top fucking kek this site is still funny sometimes
Hahaahaaaa this is great
Youd better come back and update us. I need to know what happens
top fucking kek this site is still funny sometimes
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 16:55:24
OP did not deliver
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 16:57:56
OP WE NEED AN UPDATE! DID YOU GET LEGENDARILY HUMILIATED?
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 17:10:32
imagine believing this shit
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 17:21:05
OP here.
So long story short: they came and it seems they were not 100% honest themselves.
They ran a train on me, they fucked me in every possible hole known to man. I must have imbibed a pint of semen. I was passed around like a rag doll and they left me on the floor. And now I am hungry and just have like 40 hot dogs in the microwave I just have to press the button
So long story short: they came and it seems they were not 100% honest themselves.
They ran a train on me, they fucked me in every possible hole known to man. I must have imbibed a pint of semen. I was passed around like a rag doll and they left me on the floor. And now I am hungry and just have like 40 hot dogs in the microwave I just have to press the button
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 20:40:26
>>20407
>the people OP has been lying to for years aren't worth HIS time...
Whew lad.
>the people OP has been lying to for years aren't worth HIS time...
Whew lad.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 20:59:28
OP here, sorry for the late update, but we ended up going to a local fireworks show after and I got home late and was tired. Tldr - I think I got away with it
>fortune smiled upon me and a light, but long, rainstorm passed through the area
>not only did this give me a great excuse to have pre-grilled everything, it also kept everyone in the house and no one questioned me when I said I put the grill away
>everyone thought the dogs were great
>one of them actually name dropped the place I got them from, but it didn’t seem like it was in an accusatory way, but more just a reference to the flavor being similar
>just laughed it off and said maybe they got the idea from me which made everyone laugh and move on
>rained cleared out and a local fireworks show said they would be behind schedule, but going forward with their show
>went and did that and I was in the clear
They said we should have a grill out again on a nicer day, but I don’t think I can pull this off a second time so I’m gonna make sure that I never accidentally put myself in this position again.
Thanks to >>20377 for the excellent idea and getting me through this potential disaster
>fortune smiled upon me and a light, but long, rainstorm passed through the area
>not only did this give me a great excuse to have pre-grilled everything, it also kept everyone in the house and no one questioned me when I said I put the grill away
>everyone thought the dogs were great
>one of them actually name dropped the place I got them from, but it didn’t seem like it was in an accusatory way, but more just a reference to the flavor being similar
>just laughed it off and said maybe they got the idea from me which made everyone laugh and move on
>rained cleared out and a local fireworks show said they would be behind schedule, but going forward with their show
>went and did that and I was in the clear
They said we should have a grill out again on a nicer day, but I don’t think I can pull this off a second time so I’m gonna make sure that I never accidentally put myself in this position again.
Thanks to >>20377 for the excellent idea and getting me through this potential disaster
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 21:26:10
>>20457
>>one of them actually name dropped the place I got them from, but it didn’t seem like it was in an accusatory way, but more just a reference to the flavor being similar
yeah he knew but didn't want it to get awkward if he pressed you lmao
>>one of them actually name dropped the place I got them from, but it didn’t seem like it was in an accusatory way, but more just a reference to the flavor being similar
yeah he knew but didn't want it to get awkward if he pressed you lmao
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 21:37:18
>>20377
This. Find a local BBQ place and be prepared to drop $200 to save face.
Or fake an illness and a trip to the ER.
This. Find a local BBQ place and be prepared to drop $200 to save face.
Or fake an illness and a trip to the ER.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 21:41:24
>>20459
>trip to the ER
That’s $500 minimum
>trip to the ER
That’s $500 minimum
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-05 22:18:03
>>20460
stop being poor. thanks.
stop being poor. thanks.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-06 06:35:51
>>20457
I’m proud of you, you built a mountain of lies, and rather than falter on them or run and hide, you chose to add more layers to that mountain. And to top it off, you even got away with it
I’m proud of you, you built a mountain of lies, and rather than falter on them or run and hide, you chose to add more layers to that mountain. And to top it off, you even got away with it
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-06 07:02:27
>>20377
I know it's an epic Simpsons may may but my family unironically does this all the time buying premade shit and bringing it to potlucks
I know it's an epic Simpsons may may but my family unironically does this all the time buying premade shit and bringing it to potlucks
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 14:14:01
>>20463
One time I forgot to buy something for a family luncheon so I stopped by kroger on the way and bought a pecan pie. Wasn't even trying to pass it off as my own but I thought it looked tacky with the kroger logo and everything so I just put it in a different pan
People brought homemade desserts, including an actual pecan pie
Everyone said "mine" was great lmfao
One time I forgot to buy something for a family luncheon so I stopped by kroger on the way and bought a pecan pie. Wasn't even trying to pass it off as my own but I thought it looked tacky with the kroger logo and everything so I just put it in a different pan
People brought homemade desserts, including an actual pecan pie
Everyone said "mine" was great lmfao
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 14:20:04
>>20430
>abscess
Wtf
>abscess
Wtf
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 14:21:17
>>20448
Wtf are you on where have you EVER in your life seen a legitimately uncooked hotdog
You're basically just heating them up out of the package
Wtf are you on where have you EVER in your life seen a legitimately uncooked hotdog
You're basically just heating them up out of the package
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 14:40:02
>>20457
Top fucking kek he actually pulled a Seymour and got away with it
Your house isnt on fire, its just the northern lights
Hilarious. And yeah i wouldnt ever have people over again unless you actually know how to grill. Maybe you should start learning now just because of this
Top fucking kek he actually pulled a Seymour and got away with it
Your house isnt on fire, its just the northern lights
Hilarious. And yeah i wouldnt ever have people over again unless you actually know how to grill. Maybe you should start learning now just because of this
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 15:11:49
>>20371
Literally just go to YouTube and you'll find nearly endless videos on how to do this. Retard.
Literally just go to YouTube and you'll find nearly endless videos on how to do this. Retard.
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 15:17:48
>>20468
Look everyone its the fag who didnt read the thread and thinks he's smarter than everyone
Point at him and laugh
Look everyone its the fag who didnt read the thread and thinks he's smarter than everyone
Point at him and laugh
Anonymous · reply · 2026-07-07 20:01:04
>>20374
>He is looking for the on button on a charcoal grill
kek
>He is looking for the on button on a charcoal grill
kek
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