I typed something incredibly long only for it to all be invalidated because I accidentally refreshed the page.

Here is the 4channel post I found from the archives that I based my original OP off of:

Alpine + distrobox/KVM make a perfectly workable ultra-minimalist desktop distro. You can use an Arch, Debian, or any other distrobox for all the corner cases where musl has no compatibility. Flatpaks are available too. Of course, it's not a distribution for newcomers, but if you're barely competent and tech savvy enough, there's nothing you can't do on Alpine that you can do on Arch, Fedora, or Ubuntu.

I am setting this up on my host machine, a laptop, and it seems like a good approach because all you'd have to do is keep the host machine updafed, if you even wanted to keep it updated at all and. it'd be easy because all your host has would be Xorg and Distrobox amongst what other software is present on your host machine

You wouldnt need to upgrade the containers if you only needed one version of software, but you'd likely have this:

Bleeding (Arch, always up to date)
Stable (Debian, never updated unless necessary)
Olden (Ancient version of Ubuntu for old software that's not available anymore)
Host (Alpine Linux as a minimalist host machine)

I have tried several Linux distributions and they all suffer from some kind of forced obsolesence through userland ABI breakage like glibc or dependency hell and so this appears to be the saving grace, or atleast the middle way when it comes to having an unchanging Linux desktop experience that's more reliable and consistent than running Win2k for 15 years straight

Hello from NixOS. I will see if this satisfies my needs.